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  • Geetha Vishwanathan

PLR - Audit of one's life

Its almost 2 years since I did this session whose memories are very much alive in my mind,

this session actually shook me completely and ittaught me that whatever happens in one’s

life, it is the soul which takes the decision to go through the same and as such we need to go

through it beautifully in order to finish karmic accounts. However most of us have fallen into

this whirlpool forgetting our true self and I am full of gratitude for such clients who come

only to remind us of our true self.

“I lost my mom last year, Mam right from the day I recall I have seen her always sick on bed

and have been taking care of her, only with a thought that one day she will be there for me

like other mothers. But it never happened, why I had to go through such a life where I had a

mother but couldn’t experience her motherhood.” This came from a client who flew to meet

me from the capital city Delhi. A simple down to earth guy working in top position of a

multinational firm, calm, composed and helping personality are the few words which describe

my client. So we set the main theme of the session why he lacked mothers love, had to take

care of her completely right from his childhood.

Me : What comes to your awareness

S : Lots of people are around......

Me : Describe them what are they wearing

S : They are wearing simple clothes...looks like some characters

Me : Look at your legs what are you wearing

S : Like kings wear..........I am wearing a mukut.

Me : How old are you...

S : I am around 50-55.....not very old or young....average...

Me : Describe yourself....

S : Am a man like raja....as you see in scripts....mahabharat etc....The Raja is trying to say

something.....

Am wearing a gold mukut etc....dressed like raja maharaj....i am about 55...

Me : What are they calling me....

S : No one...is calling me....I am all alone.... In a place which is a beautiful

garden..........raja is wearing jewellery but nobody is around.....some garden.....he is

searching for someone.....he is tensed...he is trying to say something....but unable

to......raja’s mother is saying something...

Me : How old is she...

S : She is around 70 year....old lady...she is saying something to raja

Me : What is Raja’s reaction

S : Raja is listening but he is not responding....she is advising me....

(He lost the scene completely as such I had to induce again so that he was more relaxed and

we continued....)

S : Some women....I am able to see...they are wearing grand dress....maharani....dress

Me : Can you feel yourself what are you doing.

S : I can feel a tiger....yes now there is a tiger...the raja is playing with the tiger with his

hands....

Me : Which year is it....

S : ...the year am unable to get only 62 is coming......

Me : what is your name how are they calling you

S : People call me shivaji......mom is calling......me .......shivaji......

I was actually jolted when I heard the name Shivaji.....who was a great Maratha king and was

very much devoted to his mother...Jijabai who actually was responsible in making her son the

great Maratha king .....but the appearance and looks of Sally were very much in contrast to

the dynamic personality of the Great warrior Shivaji.....(No judgements at all)

Me : Whats coming to your awareness?


S : I am seeing sword in my hand......and shouting......walking and people around me are

also walking....i am walking in a mountain...mother was sitting in a palki.....many people

are around me.....

I love my mother very much ....missing her....

S : She is telling me to do something...I am denying it.......

i am not understanding what she is trying to say......its as if its muted

Me : Is she still telling you something.......

S : No now I am seeing forest......I am alone nobody is around......I am searching for

something not sure what......I am alone in the forest don’t know what I am

searching....i guess I am searching for something....

Me : Are you lost......how do you feel.....

S : No I am searching..........not lost....i am searching........I am crying......crying and

searching......yes ....

Me : You want to be here or want to move ahead

S : I want to move ahead.

(Had to take him to the next moment since he was feeling very much depressed and sad)

Me : What happened what comes to your awareness

S : I reached the fort.........people are happy seeing me.....Now I am also happy.......mom

is very happy.....everybody is happy......am With mom...... am crying.....there is a tiger

which is very angry.......me and my motherI am just standing and seeing......my wife is

there...I guess i feel tired and want to be back.....

S : Can see eyes of my mom......felt as if my mom came all over and above me.....(opens

his eyes)))) in a jerk......

(Sometimes the happenings is so painful that the soul is scared to go to some painful

moment)

Me : Its Ok we are just witnessing to relieve you of all the sufferings you are holding

on....just remember we are only witnessing....what comes to your awareness....

S : seeing myself I want to do many things but I am unable to see my

mothers....pain......not able to do anything......looks like she is in pain and I am seeing

her and she is seeing me.....i feel really pained that I am unable to help her.....

Me : Allow yourself to go to the life due to which you are suffering....

S : I am riding a horse..... going somewhere.. towards mountain......I am seeing lots of

white shells around.....looks like am going to meet mom.....she is in some temple in a

mountain.....i guess she doesn’t stay there but she has been there.....i am now speaking to my

mother telling her ghar chalo...she is saying shivaji tujhe meri yaad aa gayi (do you

remember me now or it actually meant so you got time for me now).....i am saying ma mein

bhoola nahi tumhe(I can never forget you)......we both are crying.....i am telling her jin jin

logon ne bura bola hai unko mein chodunga nahi (those who said bad things to you I will not

leave them)....i am taking her back.....

I took my sword and I said mein chodunga nahi kisi ko...(I will not leave anybody)...now

lightening is there everywhere.....my mother is saying you should get married ...I don’t want

to...I am saying mughalon se ladna..(need to fight mughals)....sara rajya aapke pairon par

rakhna hai..(I want to keep whole kingdom in your feet)....mom is saying mujhe kuch nahi

chahiye ( I don’t want anything)

I have gone to fight jung (war)am riding horse......I am talking to people.... we will fight for

the mountain....if you want to win the battle.......message came from my mother....when you

are coming back...

.shivaji band karo bahut ho gaya(stop fighting now its going too far)...

..i am sending message....abhi nahi thoda hi hua hai bahut kuch bacha hai abhi nahi....(only

little has been conquered a lot is still left)....


Me : Describe your Mom

S : She is wearing Marathi saree.....

Me Which year is it...

S : 1762 is the year.....mein jung main hi hoon.....(I am in a war)

Mom is waiting for me and I am here fighting.....she is very sick I am telling her I will come

soon but I am unable to go.....she is on the verge of dying but I am just not coming....

I am saying sab jeet liya aap kahan ja rahe ho..( I have won everything now where are you

going)....i am shouting and crying save my mom......I am crying hard.....now I am seeing

mother’s eyes...i am cursing myself...I should have spent more time....with her.....

Its totally dark and only raja’s mukut is there.....i am seeing the full fort....talking to

somebody.....i am telling him yeh hamara hai...(this is ours).....this guy is saying chatrapati

shivaji yeh tumhara hai.....(this is yours chatrapati shivaji)

(The client was so loud shouting Chatrapati Shivaji...I Felt as if I was witnessing a War right

in front of my eyes....I was completely jolted on hearing Chatrapati Shivaji....)

I am seeing my death bed....i am thinking.....just reconciling what I have done.....i am

thinking of everybody....people.......

Me : what lessons you learn from that life...

I was not at all humble.....what all things I have done......I am thinking I have not lived a

complete life......I am criticizing myself......I lived only a balanced life not a peaceful

life....many things.....i could have done which I could not do......

Looks like this life is continuation of past bad and good things have come up....so I am

connecting the bad.....i am trying to do better where I have done bad....

My birth is all about past connections and this whole life is about realizing the mistakes of

past......As I look back at my life and ponder on all my accomplishments, missed

opportunities, shortcomings and belongings, I feel a surprising lack of passion and emotion as

I conduct the audit of my life.

Feel very light....

The session ended there leaving me completely amazed and shocked and client peaceful. The

strong lesson which this session taught was that we are accountable for every single act

which we do. I realised that I am a mere actor in the Play enacted on the Stage of Life. The

play is directed by the all Knowing Supreme Consciousness that is ever present. My life is as

per the script of the Divine Director and I play a small yet significant role the Play.

The script is complete, the scene is complete, the timing is complete, the fellow players are

complete and the Divine Director is complete. “Om poornamadah poornamidam poornaat

poornamudachyate, poornasya poornamaadaaya poornamevaavashishsyate”- Isha Upanishad.


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